I can tell I’m not doing that when I feel a scratchy headache irritating my brain and tension grating at my nerves.
When I feel that stressed-out feeling, I try to remember to humble myself. I try to stop and catch myself from wondering,
“Why is my kid acting so badly?”
and instead ask,
“What is it that I could be doing differently to bring harmony back into my home?”
A toddler’s heart is available and open to doing what feels good.
“If a toddler has to do something they don’t want to do, like remove those hands from the above-mentioned places, or surrender a toy they’ve been playing with, they let you know they’re not happy about it. Crying, whining, pouting, temper tantrums, throwing things, general mass destruction; these are all employed to demonstrate unhappiness.
Do people around you even know when you’re unhappy? Do you? Have you sealed yourself off from doing what feels good simply because other people have told you that’s what you should do?
I recognize myself employing the just “grin and bear it” technique quite a lot. My toddler has taught me however, that it is not always necessary as much as I once thought it to be. He’s taught me to find what feels good and to do that instead.-Lesson 28, If It Feels Good, Do It.
Go figure, despite hints to the contrary, my book Heart of a Toddler: The Zen in Them: 51 Lessons Learned from a One-Year-Old on Enjoying Life became available for purchase in paperback or Kindle edition on Amazon.com this week.
In Heart of a Toddler, I talk about how it is the youngest children that can be our greatest teachers, akin to Zen masters.
What I’ve enjoyed most is the great dialogue about positive parenting that talking about this book has opened up. Availability and openness allows the good stuff to flow in.