Notice how roadsigns never say, “Don’t run over pedestrians?”
Say What You WANT to Happen
Maybe it’s because they are so pure and so close to being just born from the source, but it seems like kids have instant karma.
Tell a kid “no” when they are in the middle of something and if they know they are wrong, they will likely sabotage themselves so that they stop doing it.
Scream, “Don’t run in the house” and sure enough, they will soon trip and fall down. Would they have fallen if you hadn’t said anything?
A lot of times we tell our kids what we are afraid will happen and just by speaking it, we make it happen. I became aware of this several years ago and since then, I make it a practice not to vocalize my fears if I can help it.
I try to avoid statements like: “Don’t run, you’re going to fall”, “Don’t put your drink down there, it’s going to spill” and “Don’t play with fire, you’re going to get burned”.
Something about the kids and the universe, the “don’t” doesn’t get heard and instead the kids just hear, “you’re going to fall”, “you’re going to spill” and “you’re going to get burned”; and then they do.
The more I pay attention, the more I realize how important it is that we choose our words with care. We are anointed with the responsibility to develop our spirit along with developing the spirit of our children.
The clearest way to do that is to change the “I am…” If you say to your child, “You are clumsy,” their self-speak will play in their brain, “I am clumsy” and then they will be clumsy and have lots of accidents. And you can see it almost instantly play out with kids and their behavior.
Instead, let positivity be paramount in your own self-speak and in the words that you choose to use with your child.
So switch around those words to focus on what you WANT to happen: “Walk so you’ll stay safe”, “Be careful and focus so that your drink stays in its cup”, “Always use caution around fire and you won’t get burned.”
Call into your life and speak the name of what you want to happen. Model for your children this positive self-speak: “I am safe, I am prosperous, I am free.” Fill in the blank with a positive and positivity will take the place of negativity instantly.